Secrets Mom's Never Tell...

So I was wracking my brain this week trying to think about what I was going to write about. I thought about it while I was cooking, cleaning and even in the shower. And then it hit me, while in the shower, what I was going to say. Why in the shower? Because while I was in there I was trying to think how I could make my shower longer so I didn't have to go out and face the 3 children fighting over a Wendy's toy in the next room. And that made me think. There's a LOT of things us mom's don't tell you "normal" people. So why not air our dirty laundry! So here's some things mom's never tell....

1. I take extra long showers so I don't have to face the kids for 5 more minutes. Why? Because when the water is running, the kids don't really come in the bathroom. Now, they DO come in to tell about someone getting hurt or so and so took something away from them, but its usually just once. :) Any other time I'm in the bathroom....forget it! It doesn't matter WHAT I'm doing in the bathroom. If the shower isn't running, they think mom is free to do WHATEVER, and I MEAN whatever!

2. We eat junk food secretly in the kitchen or our bedroom so the kids don't know! Because if the kids catch you eating a cookie, they want it too, and I'm not sharing my cookie, because some days, its all thats keeping me sane.

3. We throw away "art" projects and pretend that it was an accident. So many times I've gotten caught by the kids. They open the trash can to see their painting, drawing, cheerio necklace, fan, card, whatever sitting on the top and I pretend that it was a mistake that it ended up there. I love the things my kids make, but I simply CAN NOT keep every single knick knack. My house is already overflowing with stuff, so yes, I throw away their projects (not all of them, but most!).

4. Sometimes I count to 3 (or 5) so the kids will do what I've told them 5 times already to do without me having to discipline them. Yea, I know it'd be better for them if I followed through and made them do it the 1st time, or even the 2nd, but sometimes, I just don't want to be the bad guy. Can you blame me?!

5. When the kids ask why, why, why...even when I know the answer, I sometimes say "I don't know" just to make them stop asking. Because who doesn't get annoyed at answering why to the same question for the millionth time?

6. Yes, I've thought about taping my child's mouth shut and/or hanging them out the window. But I'd never do that of course! But sometimes its fun to think about. ;)

7. I've given my kids Benadryl to make them go to sleep. Yep, you heard right, I drug my kids....occasionally. I also give them bandaids for no apparent reason just so they will stop whining about the scrape or boo-boo they think they have.

8. If I have a day where I get to sleep in, and the kids wake up before me and come into the room, sometimes I pretend I don't hear them so they will go back to bed for another 1/2 hour.

9. I've "ignored" the kids on occasion so I can play Bejeweled Blitz or Angry Birds on my phone. Yes, I ignored them telling me "Look what I did" for the one hundredth time that day so I can play for 5 minutes.

10. I've used my kids as an excuse to not do things.

11. I've secretly hidden annoying toys from the kids. I've also said that there aren't any batteries for that toy, even when I know that we just bought a new pack. Some toys are just so annoying you can only take it for so long. Don't judge me, you'd do the same thing if you heard the Chicken Dance song a thousand times a day!

I know you may think some of those are awful, but sometimes its survival. I'm not a bad mom. Sometimes I'm just an over-worked, stressed out, need a break kind of mom and I do what I need to, within reason, to stay sane so I can spend another day loving and caring for my kids. And don't doubt for a second that I don't love them, because even with all the craziness, whining, screaming, fighting, questions, lack of sleep or time alone, I DO love those kids and would do anything for them.

<3 Mya